Look, I know it’s cliche for us unconventionally spiritual lassies to have wolves on the brain. But I have wolves on the brain. Let’s just leave it at that.

As is my usual when I have something on the brain, away I go to my vast expanse of books (I can claim this nowadays; hooray) and reach for whatever’s appropriate. I ordered THE WEREWOLF BOOK some time ago, so that’s an easy call. No, it’s not the most sophisticated book on wolves. I wouldn’t even know what is. It is, however, goofy, and it’s meant to feed my head, so it’ll do.

So. It’s 24 hours later. I knew it was goofy. It clearly falls amid those “paranormal” books that line the New Age section of the bookstore. While everyone around here knows that I happily and unapologetically frequent the New Age section, it’s also no secret that I was raised by scientists and, as such, approach all New Age topics with a certain amount of reserve. I knew it was goofy, it was meant to feed my head, whatever.

I guess I didn’t know, well, just how goofy. Exhibit A, from the introduction:

This may be the most frightening book that you will ever read. As you explore the encyclopedic entries of werewolfism and shapeshifting down through the centuries, you may begin to feel your own psyche stirring with certain ancient memories. As you examine accounts of those who have succumbed to the stirrings of the ancient beast within, you may find yourself repelled by lives so twisted by evil. Remember to remain balanced and to emphasize within your own concept of self and soul that you are one with the strengths of community and family that you cherish the moral values that great spiritual masters have bequeathed to us both by their teachings and by their examples.

And then, we segue right into entries on Abbott and Costello and Hammer films. Clearly, this is the most frightening book I will ever read.

Upon my dramatic reading of the introduction, Leland was reminded of a similar warning in an old book of Harlan Ellison tales. “GO AT YOUR OWN RISK!” He was sincere, of that I have no doubt. But… come on, man.

(Disclaimer: I have nothing but respect for Harlan Ellison. Harlan Ellison is more prolific than I could ever hope to be, and he comes up with the best titles ever. Please don’t kill me.)

Incidentally, my favorite R.E.M. song is “Wolves, Lower”. I’ve probably mentioned that already.